12 Basic Principles Of Love
Published on Wednesday, October 26th, 2011 at 5:16 pm and is filed under Psychology Tips
Promising are those relationships that promise to be long-term, stable and at the same time bring joy to both partners. Such relations are based on the principles of the so-called healthy love of which writes American psychologist Tracy Cabot. She identifies 12 key principles of love, which can make you happy, to fill life with joy, and not to deprive the rest, sleep and energy.
1. When two people enter into a loving relationship, the life of each of them should be improved. If not, the Union sooner or later falls apart.
Tip: A man in a marriage usually defends his interests. But sometimes it does not interfere with both spouses to look at the situation from the outside and think about how happy whether your partner or fiancée is.
2. You cannot buy love. If you do this, do not expect that your costs will be repaid a hundredfold.
Tip: But money can buy many other things that bring joy to your loved one. In love, money – are just means, when spending, be unselfish.
3. Avoid jealousy. Provoking jealousy, you’re playing with fire. Someone will burn. People are already prone to jealousy, that they lack self-confidence, so you should not deliberately cause this feeling.
Tip: The peaceful atmosphere in the family is based on the principle of trust for each other.
4. In a healthy loving relationship, both partners depend on each other equally.
Tip: This is the ideal, but in practice more often it is not like this, one is always dependent on other more. Family is not a battlefield for equality and independence. The main thing is to be a self-sufficient person.
5. Truly loving person does not require proof of a partner reciprocal feeling. He proves his love.
Tip: Actually, we all want to be loved, and the evidence is very important. However, the American psychologist is right about one thing: to claim that evidence is not necessary. If you do not symptoms, make a conclusion: either you have vision problems, or your lover does something wrong.
6. Beware of the desire to change the partner. If you are turning in another person’s partner, remember that perhaps this new person will not want to stay with you.
Tip: It is very difficult to change the nature of the adult. Strong people avoid outside pressure and the weak cannot stand it. If a man really loves you, he will change for the better. And if you absolutely do not like his character, someone you love really is: him or a fictitious character?
7. Person exposed to depression are difficult to love. Love should make a man happy, but the society of your does not guarantee happiness. Only you can make yourself happy or miserable.
Tip: It is difficult – does not mean impossible. After all, we fall in love, not because we solve: in this I think I fall in love, and that for this purpose does not fit to me. Person suffering from depression, need positive emotions, and it is possible that you will help him be happy.
8. A woman wants to think that she’s loved by an unavailable prince, and not by a suffering psycho. Men just do not like the hysterical and so-called ticking time bomb of which is unknown, what to expect, because it can explode at any moment. The unpredictability of the partner loosens the nerves and kills the sense of just the same way boredom leads to full and absolute predictability.
Tip: Everything should be with measure. Family life, of course, should not be like a blockbuster. If you notice that your husband (wife) always makes a scene and scandals and get pleasure from it, it is unlikely you will have to arrange a happy family life. Try to go to a family counselor to help you find the root of the problem.
9. Rapidly erupted love is quickly exhausted.
Tip: Before you take a serious decision to link your life with someone else, check your attitude to the test. Maybe you are taking too serious a temporary hobby.
10. If a partner has learned that he can mistreat you, to convince him otherwise will be very difficult.
Tip: If you are regularly hurt by your partner, there is a legitimate question – but does he love you? Do you want the relationship?
11. If you are unsure about your planned action, you should refrain from it. It is better to wait until it comes you to mind the best solution.
Tip: It is also not worth talking too much. Almost always we have to feel sorry for the words spoken by the heat of the moment.
12. People tend to feel most comfortable with the partners that are equal in their social status and being with psychological opposites. In other words, you will approach people with your level of education and similar backgrounds. Remember, in order to marry a prince on a white Mercedes, you need to be a princess in a red Porsche convertible. Your life values must match. This means that if you have a university degree, you should seek a partner with university diploma.
Psychological antipode will stabilize your emotional state. Extrovert to introvert is required, to the pessimist – an optimist. .
Tip: Unfortunately, even these requirements do not guarantee that you’ll be speaking the same language. So when meeting you should not immediately interested in the diploma. Sometimes people from different worlds are much more aware of each other, than those who are in the same circle. In life as in love there are no universal rules.
In summary, the psychologist says, ‘If on the stages of tying and building relationships, you find that one or more principles are violated by your partner, then this person should stay away until you have time to become dependent on the long-awaited, but obviously hopeless feeling. ”
And we, for our part, we want to encourage you not to pick a husband or wife as a commodity in a shop on the principle of ‘fit-does not fit. ” Trust your heart, and it sure will tell you with whom you will be happy.