The Monotony Of Sexual Life

Popular Psychology. Psychologist’s Advice On A Daily Basis. The Monotony Of Sexual Life

The issue

If your sex life has become monotonous and predictable, almost to nauseam, urgently take action. Let sex be the first thing you do in the morning, but not the last - in the evening. Do this in a new environment, new clothes, new attitude. Even the most amazing lover bores, if you have learned by heart all of his tricks.
In the early days of marriage or intimate relationship there was no word about sameness. Mutual affection and impatience forced to have sex in different settings and with all possible variety of postures and techniques. But over time, what was a novelty, has become familiar and even boring.

The reason

Sex partners get used to each other. That is completely natural and in many ways is good, because it provides comfort in sexual relationships. However, as psychologists say, the habit of the constant presence of each other leads to the fact that mutual attention and interest are extinguished to the extent that the couple can not even feel the need to communicate.
The fact that is the habit and routine, including sex, becomes boring. A man is not peculiar to hold the attention on anything for long. Diversity is necessary in all aspects of life - work, food, and, of course, sex.

Did you know that?

Why is it difficult to remain faithful for long to the same sex partner? There are biological causes. Over millions of years of human evolution as a species it developed an addiction to sexual diversity, which is part of a successful strategy of reproduction. Human beings are not designed by nature limited to one sexual partner, so that sexual boredom, coupled with monogamy, it is quite reasonable.
Multiple sex better ensures the preservation and multiplication of the genes in the progeny of a given individual, which ultimately is the goal of reproductive behavior. But this does not mean that the man is slave to his genes. People inherent unite in pairs, even in cultures where is traditional multiple sexual contacts.
Long-term success and, therefore, happy sexual relationship - a complex psycho-physiological problem, however, it can be solved.

How serious is that?

Sometimes you just need to realize that you are the victim of routine. The man often is afraid to admit this, and thinks that there is something wrong with him or that the recognition in the habit has a traumatic effect on the sexual partner.

The solution

Take the first step. Do not assume in advance that your partner does not want to think about how to break the monotony of relationships. If you get bored, then most likely she gets bored too. Boring are becoming not the people themselves, but the relations between them. If you have a good idea, then your partner is likely to support it.
Play by the rules. Introduction comic rules – a great way to spice in sex life. Announce that today is the “Night of the Three Positions,” or “Night Bust” or “Night of Sex Standing.” Anything – as long as it gets you and your partner excited. Boredom is out of bounds. Come up with rules that ban on the familiar pose. For example, for three-month decline the traditional “missionary position. Or disable yourself for a week to have sex in bed. This way you do not limit your sexual life, but instead discover new and exciting opportunities.
Win again. Re-try with your regular sexual partner, the effect of the first meeting. Behave like during the beginning of your acquaintance. Seduce her! However, for such a role-playing is compulsory voluntary participation of the interested partner.

Alternative approaches

Erotic films. They will help awaken the imagination of partners that are used to each other and to breathe new life into sex. But only if you both do not have anything against it. Not all women like to watch these films.
For those who agree, you should choose a film with a meaningful subject, not deprived of romanticism, pornography rough without a hint of feelings can have an opposite effect of the desired effect.

Toys for adults. Try special adaptations of the store of intimate accessories, such as vibrators for women. Their choice is great, so visit the store, along with your partner. Ring will help men, it  is put on the base of the penis, which impede blood flow and maintain an erection.
The ring can not be worn more than 30 minutes, it may stop blood flow to the penis and cause permanent damage to the tissues.

Prophylaxis

Sex should be a priority. One of the saddest consequences of intense rhythm of modern life is that many put off sex ”for later”. You work, she works, and you have kids. If the usual time for sex comes later in the evening, after exhausting day cares, success is unlikely, and therefore, the interest will fade. How can you enjoy sex when you’re not already able to enjoy anything?
Be sure to take your time to having sex. Choose the right time, in order that nothing bothered you.